How to Overcome Negative Thoughts and Improve Your Mindset

“I never do anything right.” “What if my friends don’t actually like me?” These are just a few examples of negative thoughts people might have. 

Everyone experiences unpleasant thoughts from time to time. But having them often can take a serious toll on your mental well-being. These negative thoughts might affect your self-esteem, relationships, and other areas of your life. 

So what can you do about them? Well, you have more power than you might think when it comes to dealing with these kinds of thoughts. 

We’ll explore what negative thoughts are and how they might affect your life. We’ll also give you multiple strategies to help eliminate them and create a more positive mindset.

What are negative thought patterns?

Negative thoughts are self-critical, pessimistic, or fear-based thoughts that can affect your mood and behavior. 

These aren’t just random or occasional unhelpful thoughts that might pop up once in a while. They’re negative thought patterns that occur frequently. In fact, you might not even realize just how often you have them if they’ve become a part of your everyday life. 

Negative thought patterns can take different forms called cognitive distortions. Some examples of these include:

• Overgeneralizing: Taking a specific event and generalizing it in a negative way, like telling yourself something bad “always” happens 
• Catastrophizing: Assuming the worst outcome or the worst-case scenario  in situations
• Jumping to conclusions: Making negative assumptions about situations, even when there’s no evidence to support that idea  
• Filtering: Only focusing on the negative aspects of situations and overlooking the positive 
• All-or-nothing thinking: Having black-or-white, either-or thinking that can lead to unrealistic expectations 
• Personalization: Thinking that you’re solely responsible for bad things that happen, even when they’re not under your control 
• Fallacy of change: Expecting others to make changes to meet your needs all the time, leading to interpersonal relationship issues
• Shoulds: Having rigid beliefs about how things should be in every situation, often resulting in frustration, guilt, and other difficult emotions

Why do negative thoughts occur?

Many people have unhelpful or pessimistic thoughts occasionally, and we can’t completely eliminate them from our lives. But these thoughts typically come and go without having any lasting or maladaptive impacts on mental well-being. 

Life experiences, anxiety, stress, or learned behavior may all lead to negative thoughts. You might have these thoughts while having a stressful day at work. Or you might have them when you’re feeling anxious about an upcoming date or medical appointment. 

These kinds of thoughts are a natural part of being human — but they can become a problem when they’re overwhelming or frequent. For example, you might engage in overgeneralizing after a bad experience. This overgeneralization might keep happening any time you have a stressful experience in any area of your life and become a negative thought pattern. 

When this negative thinking is left unchecked, it may end up having a maladaptive impact on your mental well-being. These thought patterns might lead to anxiety, depression, relationship problems, and other issues that affect your mental wellness. 

How negative thoughts can impact daily life 

An occasional negative thought doesn’t have much — if any — impact on your day-to-day life. But persistent, intrusive thoughts can affect almost any area of your life and well-being. 

Negative thoughts might lead to low self-esteem and increased self-doubt, affecting your job performance or preventing you from pursuing a promotion or asking for a raise. 

These unhelpful thoughts can also affect your relationships. You might develop unrealistic expectations for other people, leaving you feeling disappointed when they don’t meet those standards. 

Or negative thoughts might make it hard for you to connect with others. One betrayal might make you jump to the conclusion that you can’t trust anyone, causing you to keep others at arm’s length. 

Negative thoughts can also impact your own personal well-being. They might end up causing you to struggle with anxiety or depression. Or you might develop sleep issues, appetite changes, or other problems that affect your physical wellness. 

Effective strategies to get rid of negative thoughts 

Having negative thoughts may not be completely avoidable — we all have them every so often. But you can take steps to reduce and eliminate negative thinking patterns that develop. This may help you take back control of your thoughts and work on building a more adaptive and positive mindset. 

In the following sections, we’ll go over several strategies you can use to handle and free yourself from negative thought patterns. 

Mindfulness and grounding techniques 

Negative thoughts can become so frequent that they seem to occur automatically, and you may not even be aware that you’re having them. But in order to eliminate these patterns, you need to recognize them. 

Mindfulness and grounding techniques can help you become more aware of your negative thoughts. When you practice being mindful, you don’t try to fight these thoughts or stop them from happening. Instead, you learn to identify them and gently redirect them without any judgment.   

You can practice mindfulness and grounding in several ways. In fact, you can try any of the following right away:

• Deep breathing: Take deep breaths, focusing your attention on your breathing to help calm your mind when you’re having negative thoughts. 
• Body scanning: Lie flat and mentally scan every part of your body, from head to toe or vice versa, while noting any thoughts or emotions you have about each part. 
• Staying in the moment: Keep your attention focused on the present moment, rather than worrying or stressing about the future or dwelling on the past.  
• Pay attention to your surroundings: Take note of what’s around you based on your senses. What can you currently see, hear, feel, touch, and taste? This helps you feel grounded and can distract you from negative thoughts. 

Cognitive restructuring and reframing 

Trying to stop yourself from having negative thoughts usually doesn’t work — and can leave you feeling more frustrated and stressed. But cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), a type of talk therapy, provides an effective way to deal with these thoughts. 

Cognitive restructuring and reframing is a common technique in CBT. It involves identifying negative thoughts and challenging them. When you’re able to recognize negative thought patterns, you can question them, gather evidence about them, and come up with alternatives to them.

This technique can help you realize just how unhelpful — and how unrealistic or inaccurate — negative thought patterns are. You can then work on changing these thoughts so that they’re more adaptive and accurate. 

For example, you might assume that your friend is mad at you if they don’t respond to your text. To reframe this negative thought, ask yourself if you have any concrete evidence that your friend is upset with you or ignoring you. If not, consider other explanations for their behavior — maybe they’re busy or they didn’t see your text yet. 

Journaling for thought awareness 

Writing in a journal can help you visualize and understand your thoughts, making it easier to recognize negative patterns. You might notice that you seem to have the same kinds of maladaptive thoughts occur frequently. This awareness can help you take steps toward managing and eliminating them. 

Studies have shown that journaling helps reduce symptoms of depression and other mental health issues and improves mental wellness. It provides an effective tool for keeping track of your thoughts and identifying negative patterns. You can then work on restructuring and reframing these thoughts on your own or with help from a therapist. 

Once you’ve identified negative thoughts, you can also use journaling to shift toward a more positive mindset. Reflective journaling prompts you can try for more positive thinking include:

• What am I most thankful for in my life?
• What challenges have I overcome recently?
• What makes me feel calm and relaxed?
• What brings me joy in my daily life?
• What’s something I’ve achieved this week that I’m proud of?
• What’s one thing I love about myself? 

Positive self-talk 

How you talk to yourself has a big impact on your mental wellness. Negative thought patterns and negative self-talk tend to go hand in hand. But you can take steps to change these to more positive and balanced affirmations, improving your mental well-being. 

Positive self-talk helps change your inner dialogue, setting you up for a shift to an overall positive outlook and mindset. But making this change may be difficult at first — especially if you’re used to negative self-talk. 

To help you create positive affirmations, here are a few examples to keep in mind:

• Switch from “I fail at everything I try” to “I’m very proud of myself for having the courage to try things.”
• Change “Nobody likes me” to “I like myself, and it’s not true that no one likes me.”
• Switch from “I can’t change anything about myself” to “I’m open to change.”

Is it possible to build a more positive mindset over time?

Yes! You can shift to a positive mindset, but it takes time. Going from negative thought patterns to positive thoughts doesn’t happen overnight. It requires persistence and patience. 

Using the strategies we’ve provided on a consistent basis may help you achieve this shift. You should notice gradual progress as you work on becoming more aware of your negative thought patterns and taking steps to change them. 

Your journey toward a more positive mindset may not be a smooth one — and that’s okay! You might experience setbacks along the way. In fact, that’s a normal part of the process. Being resilient in the face of these setbacks is the key to making lasting changes. 

To help you stay motivated, consider:

• Setting small, achievable goals rather than large ones that are difficult to accomplish 
• Celebrating your successes as you achieve smaller goals 
• Reminding yourself that setbacks are just a normal part of changing your mindset to a more positive one 

Signs that a professional therapist may be able to help

Using self-help strategies, like practicing mindfulness or journaling, can be helpful. But there are times when you might need professional support, especially if unwanted thoughts are causing you considerable distress or interfering with your daily functioning.

The following are some signs that can indicate it might be time to get help from a licensed therapist for negative thoughts:

• Persistent anxiety symptoms, such as having a sense of dread 
• Depression symptoms and feelings of hopelessness 
• Difficulty managing daily activities like work or household tasks 
• Trouble with interpersonal relationships due to negative thoughts 

If you think it’s time to see a professional, SonderMind is here to help. We can connect you with a qualified mental health professional who specializes in CBT approaches for managing negative thoughts. 

Take the next step toward a positive mindset 

Negative thoughts might pop up in your mind from time to time. But if you’re struggling with frequent or persistent thoughts that are affecting your well-being, it might be time to make a change. 

Using the strategies we’ve talked about to recognize and change negative thought patterns can help you eliminate them and replace them with more helpful ones for improved wellness. And if you need more help and support, mental healthcare professionals can provide that. 

At SonderMind, you can start seeing a licensed therapist with experience in CBT in as little as two weeks. We’ll get to know your needs and connect you with the right therapist for your situation.

Ready to start working toward a more positive mindset? Get started with SonderMind today.